Unfortunately, I do not live in the same town as my parental units.
I truly wish I did b/c I'm their only child and I would like to live closer so that I could help them when they need help.
Anyway, since I am in town with them right now I was asked to take my dad to his annual eye appointment at the opthomologist.
Now keep in mind that when my dad has appointment for ANY-THING we have to be there early. Earlier than most people would consider a "normal early".
His appointment was at 11am today (tuesday).
So as far back as last Saturday he's been reminding me over and over that we need to leave the house at 10:40am.
10:40.
TEN-FORTY AM.
"Okay Dad....that's no problem."
This morning at some unnatural hour he has my daughter come up and check on me to make sure that I know that we need to leave at TEN-FORTY IN THE MORNING.
Okay.
Now I am a working mother of 3 children and I can get showered, dressed, eat, make coffee, let the dog out, feed my 3 children, put shoes on and get out the door in less than 10 minutes.
I am a woman.
I can do all of this without even flinching.
I am a mother.
I can do this and yell at my children all at the same time if I need to.
Women/Mothers can multi-task.
SO, I get up, way earlier than I had planned this morning to make SURE that I am ready and available to leave at, (wait for it) 10:40am.
Finally the "golden time" arrives and my dad and I head out in my matronly mobile (aka my minivan)...
I'm driving b/c my dad is getting his eyes blown up (I mean, dilated)....and he won't be able to see after his appointment for approximately 72 hours (according to him).
I've never been to his eye doctor so he patiently directs me.
Realizing that the earth WILL END if we don't get to the appointment on time I drive somewhat unsafely and break a few laws....b/c I would rather have a police man yell at me than my dad....Blessedly, no one caught me/us running lights (yellowish,reddish,greenish is a traffic light color, right?) or sorta skipping and dancing through a few stop signs.
I get my father TO his appointment EARLY'ish which for him equates "on time".
As we're walking into the doctor's office I realize that I am the youngest person anywhere near this building (which is in downtown Erie--near the major hospital and other doctor's offices) within a 20 mile radius.
This fact would have made me proud except for the fact that as we were walking into my dad's appointment I saw that the doors for the EYE doctor were made of solid glass. Now, have I mentioned that this is an appointment for an E-Y-E doctor...which means, presumably, that the people who go to this doctor are people who are visual needs. This isn't for the hearing impaired or the psychiatrist, this is an EYEBALL DOCTOR.
And the dude has FOR HIS OFFICE solid glass doors.
WHAT????????????????????????????
I would have walked RIGHT into the door (no joke-and I have good'ish vision) were it not for my dad (who doesn't have good'ish vision).
LUCKILY, my dad knew/saw where the door handle was....in THE SOLID GLASS DOORS.....
I was mortified.
If I were an eye doctor I would have huge signs and lights and possibly even a disco ball floating above all doors that would be in my office area.
NOT SOLID GLASS.
NOT SOLID GLASS with some writing on it and pretty designs that sort of hide the handle for the DOOR!!!!!
I could have broken my nose if I hadn't been with someone older and more mature than me!!! ;-)
Anyway, 2 hours later, my dad's eyes were dilated and he came out with a very sexy pair of sunglasses.
You all know what I'm talking about....those sunglasses that are the size of South America, the cover every pore of your face so that if you accidentally look at the sun after having your eyes dilated you don't blow your eyes out of your face.
They are very unattractive.
And while I can't imagine ANYONE who has had their eyes dilated WANTING to stare at the sun....I guess doctors worry about the sanity of their patients and thus, they all must wear those super unattractive glasses.
OR the doctors just make their patients wear them b/c they know, like we all know, that they make people look funny ;-)
I got my dad safely back home and his eyes are good. They're healthy. They're continuing to serve him well. And once the 72 hours is over, he'll be able to go out into the sunshine again.
WITHOUT the sexy black sunglasses ;-)
God bless,
Elizabeth
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